Finding Zeke - An Adoption Story

After searching the entire world for him, we found Zeke in an unlikely place. 

Here’s the story of how Zeke came to be with us. 

Spring Break 1996 - Mexicali, Mexico

I began serving Jesus as a 17 year-old senior in high school. That's a long story for another day, but there is an important part of that I need to tell. It was my senior year, and my longtime girlfriend had broken up with me. During that relationship I had cut off all ties to my friends, and was left standing alone. With nothing left to turn to, I decided I'd surrender my life to Jesus. Soon after, God brought a friend named Noelle into my life. She had been a Christian for a long time, and was encouraging me to step outside of my comfort zone and go on a mission trip to Mexico. I distinctly remember the conversation we had about that mission trip. "Jody, I think you should go to Mexicali this year during Spring Break." Dismissively, I responded, "It costs a lot of money, right?" Noelle said, "It's $100." I said, "Sure, if I find $100, I'll go." To which she responded, "I'll pray that God sends you that $100."

I got home that night, and my dad said "Jody, my boss needs his fence painted and he's willing to pay someone to do it. Would you like to earn some money?" I begrudgingly responded, "How much does it pay?"

"$100." Well, I guess I'm going to Mexico.

Although I had become a Christian 4 months earlier, I hadn't truly surrendered my life. I was a pretty focused kid, focused on making money. I was reading books like How to Win Friends and Influence People and Think and Grow Rich, and I had already decided I would be a millionaire by the time I was 25. My plan at that time was to strike it rich and retire around age 30.

The mission trip seemed safe enough. I was going to be part of the kitchen staff. We would get up at 4:00 am and make breakfast for the 2,500 high school students who had come from all around the country to preach the gospel to children, through Vacation Bible School programs. It was the first time in my life my sole purpose was to serve others. We had a great time, singing, playing games, and just loving being there.

I had met a group of students from Apple Valley, California, who asked me if I wanted to join them for the day. I agreed, and the following day, Wednesday, in the middle of Spring Break, I drove with them in a van to a small village in Mexicali, Mexico which would forever change me.

The day was spent playing, doing Vacation Bible School with them, loving them, eating with them, falling in love with their culture, and falling in love with them, really. There was one little boy in particular. He was 3 years old, with very chubby cheeks, a thick head of jet black hair, and didn't speak a word the entire day, in English or Spanish. I was told by his sister his name was Quiel, and I thought he was mute. We spent every minute together until dinner. Cute as cute can be, and all he wanted was to be loved.

Late in the day, after dinner, it was time to for us to go back to the camp. I knew I would never see any of those people again, and I was looking around for Quiel, but I didn't see him anywhere. As we were getting into our vans to leave, Quiel and his sister came walking up, just in time to say goodbye. He ran to me. I picked him up in my arms, and Quiel buried his nose into my neck, his very chubby right cheek lay against my left shoulder, and his full thick head of black hair was wet with tears. I tearfully explained, in Spanish, that I was leaving and I wouldn't be seeing him again. Finally, I said I have to go, and whispered, "Te amo, Quiel (‘I love you’).” This little man, who hadn't uttered a single syllable the entire day, who I didn't think could even speak, picked his head off of my shoulder, looked at me in the eyes and said, "Te amo, Hody." I nearly crumpled to the ground.

As our van drove away, God broke and softened my heart. The entire ride back to camp, I wept. I was sad, for sure, but it was deeper than that. I realized there is so much more to life than money, than things, than what I could acquire. People. My life is going to be about people and relationships. That day God gave me a missional heart. 

Kirby's Birth - Scary and Life-Altering 

Fast forward 15 years to the birth of our daughter, Kirby. We were in a military hospital, in the middle of God-forsaken nowhere, my wife was sick, and her sickness was about to end her pregnancy after 37 weeks. Alison was ready to push and deliver our healthy baby girl, and the doctor checked Alison one last time. The doctor's countenance dropped, and I could see it in her face. "She's breech."

Two minutes later Alison was in the OR and I was frantically putting on my scrubs to assist the doctor. A new life flashed before my eyes, one with just me and my two boys.  Fear gripped me. All alone, I dropped to my knees and begged God to save my girls. Moments later, I was assisting the doctor by pushing with all of my might on Alison's abdomen, trying to physically turn Kirby in the womb. The doctor said if Alison had been any further along than 37 weeks, it would have never worked. Well, it worked. It was the first time that doctor had succeeded in a mid-labor external cephalic version (manual turn of a baby). Sufficed to say, I was relieved, but I was determined that would be our last biological birth.

Living under the Same Roof on Different Pages

Kirby's first year of life was a very difficult one for us. We were still living in the middle of the desert, both literally and figuratively. I knew I was done having kids, and Alison wasn't convinced. She felt our family wasn't yet complete. I set an appointment to make sure we would not have any more children, and Alison's heart was broken, shattered. Although she reluctantly gave her approval, it was only on the condition that we seriously consider adoption. It was something we had talked about for years, so I agreed and went through with the surgery.

For a year and half after the surgery, Alison and I lived on separate pages regarding our family. Alison knew our family wasn't complete, but I was not yet convinced. Kirby had exhausted us. Although she had brought immense joy, lack of sleep and living in the middle of the wilderness had taken its toll on Alison. I barely recognized the woman I was married to. The hundreds of hours of sleep she was missing was difficult for everyone. Adding the scare I had during Kirby’s birth with the difficulty of having another newborn, I decided there was no way was I having that happen again. So I dug in my heels, and committed that we were done having children, biological or otherwise.

Consequently, Alison was crushed. The man she dated had claimed he wanted seven kids. The man she married wanted a big family, and loved children.  We had been through seven long years of infertility to get our children and now we would say, "no more"? She didn't recognize the man who had told her his story, about the little boy in Mexico who changed his life. What happened with that little boy, Quiel, who largely led Jody to become a day camp counselor, a teacher, and a youth pastor? Where was that man now? Lying next to her in bed was a man who was a lawyer, and no longer a teacher. He was the father of three children, and no longer wanted to add to that number. This was incomprehensible to her.

We were at an impasse.

A Breakthrough

A year and a half ago, we came to (emotional) blows late one night into early the next morning. Through tears and pouring out our hearts to one another we both (I was unaware, too) came to a very important discovery. My missional heart had been buried. I was a slave to my law school loan debt, and I was afraid if I let my heart be touched by that missional heart again, I would quit my job and [irresponsibly] go on the mission field. I knew I couldn't do that, so I had let my heart harden, to children, to missions, to God, and to my wife. I reluctantly agreed to begin the adoption process on one condition: It had to be international. I didn't want to adopt from the US. This adoption would be to change the trajectory of someone's life. Ideally, I wanted to adopt someone like Quiel. He would have brown skin and speak Spanish (or would have, had he grown up in his country of origin). So we began our search. But we set parameters. The main one was that we needed to keep the birth order (Kirby was 2). Immediately, everywhere in the Western Hemisphere below San Diego was not an option because the youngest adoptable child from any Spanish-speaking country was 4 years old. Looks like I will not get that little Hispanic guy I was hoping for. Well, now what?

So we tried Africa, specifically the Democratic Republic of the Congo ("DRC").We got very excited about this possibility. In the midst of our adoption, the government of the DRC stopped issuing exit visas because of some questionable practices among foreign adoption agencies and therefore closed this option for us.

The rest of Africa? None worked with our situation because governments had closed their adoptions to outsiders or because of the time required in country (two months or more).

So we tried Haiti. But there, you meet your baby, spend two weeks with them, and are reunited two years later. Our hearts couldn't handle that.

Puerto Rico? That seemed like a good option, but we couldn't find an agency that had successfully completed a Puerto Rican adoption! So that was out. We thought maybe China? Six year wait list.

Russia closed, Korea was out.

So what's left? Sigh. The US.

I dug in my heels. "No. I'm not doing a domestic adoption. The whole reason I agreed to this was for missional reasons!"

Alison was not deterred. [This should be a lesson to you! When God places something on your heart, fight for it!!!] She contacted several agencies about completing a domestic adoption. Do you know how awful adoption agencies can be? They don't call you back. They don't email. They don't respond to simple inquiries. For someone who lives in a world where you deal in logic and reason and responsiveness, I was disgusted by the lack of any of those found at the agencies we gave money to (in the form of adoption applications).

Then one night, everything changed for me. I had an epiphany. Aunt Tracie! I could do a domestic adoption because of Alison’s Aunt Tracie.

Spring 1996 - 215 Miles from Mexicali, Mexico

Flash back to 1996, Alison was also 17 (we’re only 5 days apart in age), and she was helping her aunt and uncle find their baby girl. The same exact time I was in Mexico, meeting Quiel and having my heart changed, Alison was speaking with a good friend of hers about adoption. You see, Alison’s aunt and uncle had been married for many years, and could not have children. Heartbroken, after losing 7 babies to miscarriage, they decided to adopt. Their home study was complete, and they were just waiting for the baby to be placed. But it wasn't happening.

Alison, in a conversation with a good friend learned that her friend's unmarried sister was pregnant. Alison told her friend's sister if she wanted a wonderful family to adopt her child, she knew just the parents. A few months later, Jack and Tracie picked up their baby daughter from the hospital. Alison was instrumental in bringing her aunt and uncle their oldest daughter, Carlie. A very special relationship ensued, and Alison is now Carlie's godmother.

The Baby Arc Comes Full Circle

Jack and Tracie later moved to New York, with their daughter, Carlie, and then moved from New York to what seemingly was the most random spot on the map anyone could imagine, Hurricane, Utah. Tracie had taken a job with a pregnancy crisis center 2,200 miles from their home in New York. A few years later, Tracie began working for an adoption agency, Premier Adoption, in the next town.

So, one night in the kitchen, Alison and I were still at an impasse regarding the adoption. I still didn't want to adopt domestically, but then something occurred to me that, for some reason had never occurred to either of us. 

What about Tracie's agency? She speaks so highly of it; why hadn't we considered that? 

What if God orchestrated this whole thing starting 19 years ago?

What if one reason God had Jack and Tracie move from New York to middle-of-nowhere Utah was so we could find our baby! 

After all, back in 1996, God used Alison to find a baby for Tracie, whom he had prepared before the beginning of time to be the mother of Carlie.

What if God now wants to use Tracie, to find a baby for Alison, whom He had prepared before the beginning of time to be the mother of Ezekiel?

How awesome would that be? Talk about full circle!

And it wasn't something anyone had considered. Closed door after closed door. We had to search the entire world, only to have every stinking door slammed in our faces, until we found the agency that would lead us to Zeke, an agency we NEVER WOULD HAVE HEARD OF had it not been for a seemingly random move from New York to Utah.

Okay. Impasse over. We're adopting domestically, I'm totally on board, and I'm more excited than ever! We are more excited than ever! 

"I've Got the Name!"

Because I had grown up with a name that can be mistaken for a girl (sorry Mom, it's true), I always wanted to name my son a hyper-masculine name, one that might be mistaken for a cowboy. Number one on the list was Duke. Honorable mentions? Cal, Tex, Chet, and Zane.

But because God gifted my wife with a brain, she promptly vetoed all of these wonderful names. "If we have a bulldog, you can name him these names, but not our son."

Fine. But I'm not naming him Shannon!

Then, in the middle of the adoption process, I ran across a toddler whose name was Ezekiel. And it hit me. Zeke! That's an awesome name, and I think I can sell it to Alison! So I immediately called Alison and told her I have our son's name. "It's a biblical name, and it means strengthened by God! Ezekiel! And we can call him Zeke!"

Much to my surprise, she agreed! Finally! Someone might think my son is a cowboy! I like it.

And we had our name. Getting closer. 

Wanting to Give Up, but the Money Keeps Coming In!

So many situations. So many nos. Too many. "Sorry, Birth Mom didn't choose you." Over and over and over and over and over.

In case you grew up in Antarctica and haven't heard, adoption is expensive.

I know, I know, but Jody's a lawyer! He makes a ton of money! No, no I don't. I decided a long time ago that lifestyle is a lot more important than money. And my wonderful job affords us a good comfortable life, with lots of time off and very reasonable work hours. But we aren't rich. That's for sure. In fact, we had $2,000 to put toward the adoption. That's it.

But the money came rolling in.

We went to California, and Alison's sister had orchestrated people donating to a garage sale for us. That garage sale earned us $1,100. Then we came back home to Colorado and had 2 garage sales totaling $2,900!

The money really started rolling in on Christmas Day, 2013. Some good friends from the military, we'll call them Pat and Hannah, called to tell us they were giving us $5,000 toward the adoption. Hannah had had several miscarriages, and we were praying and believing that God would give them a baby. Hannah had wanted a tennis bracelet for a long time, but the Lord prompted her and she said to her husband, "Let's give this money to Jody and Alison for their baby. That will last forever. This tennis bracelet is fleeting." By the way, Hannah got pregnant less than a month after they gave us the money, and she carried him to term. They had a healthy son not 10 months after they blessed us with that gift! 

A few weeks later, Alison got a message from a friend who, a couple of years earlier, had adopted a wonderful, happy, healthy little boy. Incomprehensibly, he got sick and suddenly died as a toddler. Instead of flowers at his funeral, they had asked people to donate to a fund. She and her husband wanted to give that money toward our adoption. I don't think we've ever been more humbled. By the way, within a few months of them giving us the money, she got pregnant and now they have a wonderful baby girl.

Then people started donating from all over the place. $500 from that young couple, $200 each month from these good friends. $1,000 from more good friends.

In September, we received a $5,000 grant. 

November 19, 2014 was a big day. It was Isaac's birthday, and I took half a day off from work. We spent it bowling and playing video games, every 5 year-old's (and let’s face it, mine, too) dream. I checked my email, and we learned of a $1,000 grant. Then we got home, and there was another $5,000 grant in the mail!

I started texting and calling friends with the good news! We're only $7,000 away!

A good friend texted and said, "Oh, we sent you a check this last Saturday, it should be there tomorrow or Friday." "Seriously?! Wow!"

Another friend texted and said, however much you have left over, we're covering the rest! Boom! One day, and our adoption was taken care of.

And then, the drought began. Nothing. No situations. No possibilities. No new birth moms.

Then a birth mom would appear. It wasn't exactly the situation we wanted (maybe drugs or alcohol was involved, for example), but we wanted to be considered anyway. And we weren't chosen.

Then again. Another possibility! But then birth mom looked at our profile book, and chose someone else.

Then we weren't chosen again. And again. And again.

And every time, we'd get our hopes up, and then they'd be dashed, again. And again.

But we'd keep going back to the money. If we weren’t supposed to adopt, why did we have all of the funding? Why did so many people give so much if we weren't supposed to keep going? I honestly think if it hadn't already paid for, we would have quit shortly before Zeke came along. 

Still, there had to be an end point, though. We couldn’t keep doing this forever.

Finally, I had a conversation with my heartbroken wife. Let's give it until the end of 2015. It's too painful. It's just too much. That email we keep getting, turning us down, again and again, is killing you. Every time you get that email, it gets worse.

"Okay. I think that's a good idea." So we have until the end of the year... sigh.

Not the Typical Situation

Typical situation is: Birth Mom in Las Vegas contacts the agency around the sixth month of her pregnancy. The situation is posted on the adoption agency's secure website, and families decide whether they think they are a match. Birth Mom reviews family adoption profile books (pick us, please pick us! book), and chooses one. Agency contacts chosen family that they are, in fact, chosen, and contacts everyone else to tell them they were not chosen. 

This is not at all what happened in our situation. One week before Zeke was born, Birth Mom did a google search for adoption agencies in Phoenix. She tried the second one down on the list, and didn't like the person she talked to, so hung up. She then tried another agency, but it went straight to voice mail. 

Finally, a little further down the page, she saw the name Premier Adoption Agency. She liked the sound of it, so she tried the phone number. Immediately, Premier's program coordinator answered the phone, her name is Isabel. Let me tell you something about Isabel. In a world of namby-pamby people who are terrible on the business end of things, Isabel is a light—she is incredible at her job, she is articulate, highly intelligent, savvy, and if I had my own business, I would attempt to hire her away from her job—and there is no one you want more to answer the phone when a possible birth mom is calling. After a conversation with Isabel, Birth Mom decided to use Premier. 

A word on Birth Mom. She is amazing. I can't give a lot of details about her, but I will tell you that she placed Zeke for adoption for one reason. She loves him. She knew she wasn't able to give him the life she wanted him to have, she chose life, and she did the most self-sacrificial thing I have witnessed. She loved him so much, she gave him to us. It’s a picture of the love that Christ has for us. It’s awesome in the literal sense of that word.

The day Zeke was born, Birth Mom went to the hospital via ambulance, and delivered him 30 minutes after arrival. She stayed to give him colostrum, and then left. She couldn't stay because his birth was a secret to her family. Still, no one knows. 

After a second phone call with Premier, Birth Mom said she didn’t want to see profile books, she just wanted the agency to choose the family. Well, the agency chose the next family on the list (not us) who was a Mormon family. Birth Mom told Isabel, she didn't really want him growing up Mormon, and that she'd like him to be with a Christian family. Isabel said, "Okay, then I'm going to choose my favorite Christian family, the Hursts!" 

One Phone Call Starts the Ball Rolling

Here's how it went down.  

Jody had taken a week off of work. It was the first time in our lives he took a vacation when we went nowhere. Smack dab in the middle of that, Alison got a call, Saturday (3/21) evening at 7:00pm, from a number showing Las Vegas. When Alison answered, it was the director of our adoption agency. At first, I was sitting on the couch, watching her, and then I saw her face light up, I mean, her face was glowing! Then the jumping up and down and pointing dramatically at the phone began. I knew immediately we had our baby. I ran over to the kitchen asked told Alison to put the phone on speaker, so I could hear. Isabel explained the situation and offered to send  pictures and records so we could take time and decide. Alison and I both immediately said, "No need to wait. He is ours!" Before called anyone or started devising a plan on how to pick up Zeke, we immediately fell to our knees in tears, praising God for completing our family.  

Within an hour, one of our friends, Tina, was in our home with a box full of newborn baby clothes and a willing heart. (Earlier that day we had exactly one outfit in the house for a newborn boy.) I went to work to pull things together there, and Alison, overwhelmed by emotion, couldn't think straight, so Tina packed our whole family for the trip. Alison fell into bed at 1:30, and I crashed at 2:30. Six hours later the five Hursts were on the road to Phoenix to get our sixth. 

We drove 16 hours straight to Phoenix. My parents' best friends, Tom and Connie, live in Phoenix and Connie contacted us through Facebook and told us she would be mad at us if we didn't stay with her. Tom was out of town working, so it was just Connie and we were welcomed with open arms into their beautiful home for as long as we needed to be there. This was an amazing blessing because this all happened in the middle of Spring Break. Hotels were $250 per night and up. Plus, it's a hotel! How awful to stay in a hotel with a newborn baby? 

Also on the drive, I got word from my supervisor and my boss I was not expected for two more weeks at work. They were taking care of everything. (As an aside, it was perfect this happened in the middle of my vacation, where I already had coverage for court, trials, etc. for the first three days we'd be in Arizona.)  

The agency told us we could go see Zeke on Monday, but he would have to go to foster care before he could be released to us on Tuesday. But then we got a call from the social worker and she told us she decided to release him from the hospital straight to us. At 10:45am Monday, she called and told us to come get our son. 

We met the social worker on the third floor lobby of the hospital with an infant car seat in hand and butterflies in our stomachs. Connie stayed with the big kids as Alison and I walked into the nursery. As soon as we walked in, I scanned the room for my son. Honestly, I didn't even see any other babies. My eyes went straight to the jet black hair. Interestingly, Alison didn't see him. She started scanning the room on the opposite side and saw all of the other babies with their little hats on. One of the nurses said to her as she pointed him out, "There is your baby." He was big and had no hat, on account of the massive amount of hair he has. No hat needed. Alison immediately picked him up, tears streaming down her face.  We had prayed for this baby for a year and a half. Dreamed of this moment when we would hold him in our arms. Here we were. We took pictures and video and strapped him into his car seat. We brought him out to the lobby where the big kids oohed and aahed over him and told him how much they loved him. 20 minutes after arrival, we got into our minivan and left that hospital. Complete.  

The Name

Interestingly, Birth Mom named him Nathaniel, which means gift of God. She didn’t know it when she named him that. But God knew.

Although that’s an awesome name, Ezekiel John has some history to it, as it turns out. Months after we decided on the name, Alison was prompted to look up Ezekiel in Spanish. It's spelled Ezequiel. And how do you shorten Ezequiel in Spanish? Quiel. I had no idea until a month or two before Zeke was born. We picked a name without even connecting the story to that little boy who changed my life, the little boy who finally, after years of denial, convinced me to want to adopt. 

Meeting Birth Mom

Initially, Birth Mom didn’t want to meet us. After all, she didn’t choose us, the Agency did. Then she looked at our profile book and saw many, many “coincidences.” I have to be careful what I write here because her identity is secret, but let me tell you these similarities were not mere coincidences. Our parenting styles, interests (think Disney), backgrounds, even geographic similarities and philosophy of life are very similar. After reading our profile book, she decided she definitely wanted to meet us. 

So Wednesday, in the middle of Spring Break, I drove with Alison in a van into the area where we met Birth Mom. It looked very similar to somewhere I had been before. In fact, it looked exactly like a little village in Mexicali, Mexico, where God had started something in my heart 19 years earlier, on a Wednesday, during Spring Break.

We met her, had lunch together, and she held Zeke. She snuggled with him, loved on him, smelled him, and cried tears all over his big ole thick head of jet black hair. She told us so many times how she wasn’t crying sad tears, but happy tears. She was so excited for the life he was going to have with us, in our family. She said, “He was meant for you!” She thanked us!

As we were saying goodbye, she hugged me for a long time and told me how excited she was that I would be Zeke’s dad. It was a very emotional and wonderful time.

And then it was time for us to get in our van and leave. 

But this time, I wasn’t leaving with a broken heart.

This time, Quiel, with his chubby cheeks, and full, thick head of jet black hair, would be coming home with me, with us, to be loved. Forever.

Little family. Big God. 

Today I met Joy

We went to the Symphony today.  Before it started, the cute gal in front of me started a conversation.  She had her 6 year old daughter with her and we got onto the topic of children.  She asked about my kids and I told her I had these 3 and we were adopting.  She asked some more questions and I told her our story.  Then, she told me she was a birth mom.  I was so honored that she would share that information with me.  I was so overwhelmed that the Lord had ordained that interaction.  She is just what I needed.  She gave me some great advice and told me to trust the Lord in this process.  I will probably never see her again, but what a sweet moment.  Her name was Joy.

I have hesitated to update because I felt like there was not a lot to report.  We've been waiting....and waiting....and waiting to be matched with a birth mom and what should I share about that??

The interesting thing the Lord has revealed to me, is that the process is as important as the matching part.  It's in the waiting where the learning happens, where the growth occurs.

It's been hard.  We've been presented multiple times and it has not been the right situation yet.  That has been hard.  Emotionally hard.  Mentally hard.  Have I mentioned that it has been hard?

Here are the things I know.  It is not about me.  It is about this little person that the Lord is going to allow me to be mommy to.  It is about what is happening in my heart as I wait.  It is about surrender and trust.  It is about that birth mom.

The Bible mentions the word "wait" 129 times.  Do you think just maybe we have something to learn in it?  It's the waiting that builds character.  It's the waiting that builds our trust.  It's the waiting that brings surrender.  I am trying so hard to sit and be present in those truths.

So, here is what is happening now. We will be presented to another birth mom tomorrow.  This may be the situation that the Lord has planned.  It may not.  Either way, I will choose to trust him and try to find joy in the process.  Please pray for us.  Please pray for her.

It was so amazing to have the face of a sweet birth mom to look into and be reminded of the other side of the picture.  The Lord brought me Joy today, in more ways than one!  

Today, I am...

Exhausted, worn out, weary, emotional, beat, hopeful, peaceful, confident and trusting.  Those are a lot of emotions to be feeling at the same time.  Let me tell you about the last 24 hours.

We got a phone call  yesterday from our Colorado Agency that did our homestudy.  There was a baby that had been born in Florida and did we want to go pick him up the next day.  Uhhhh...come again?  We would be the only family in line if we said yes.  We prayed, we reeled, we tried to figure out how we could make this work.  How could we get to FL in less than 24 hours notice?  What would we do with the kids?  How would Jody swing this with work?  We have NOTHING...I mean NOTHING for the baby yet.  No carseat, no bottles, no formula, no clothes...NOTHING!  Oh and the money.  We were about $12,000 short.  How could we come up with that?  I mean, this was a baby...possibly our son, who needed parents to come and get him.  The agony!!!

We prayed and asked our parents to pray. We looked at all the details and decided that there were too many unknowns to move forward.  We had no details about the baby's health, background of the birth mom, what the exact situation looked like.  We waited and as the hours passed and we still had no information, we decided we could not move forward.  We LOVE our agency in NV. We trust them.  We know that the Lord led us to them for a reason.  We want to use them to adopt our child.  We did not know this FL agency.  We did not know their practices and their level of integrity.

Peace set in and the longer time went by, we knew we had made the right decision.  But, boy is it hard!!!

So, we press on.  We trust on.

We will be presented to a birth mom next week and we know that our child is coming.  In the meantime, I realized that it might be a good idea to gather some things here to have ready.  We trust God that He will bring the finances as we need them!  (We will keep you posted!)  We just received a $5,000 grant, so that is super exciting!!

Here is a list of the things we need. If you have one (or some) of these things that you are no longer using, please let us know!

*  baby monitor (we do not need anything fancy!)
*  newborn and size 1 diapers
*  a bouncy seat
*  a swing
*  bottles
*  formula
*  burp cloths
*  bibs
* You know...all the stuff that you need for a newborn, which I got rid of because I did not know we would need them again...those things!!


Thank you for praying for us!  We so appreciate each and every one of you!  Even though I have so many emotions racing through my veins this day, we are so confident in the one who knows the whole story.  He is the I AM and HE will never leave us or forsake us.  He knew our child would be part of our family from the beginning of time.  In that I put my trust!

  

Walking by faith...

A lot is going on right now.

Grant application #4 was mailed off last week.  We are not expecting to hear back from any of them for a few weeks/months, but hoping and praying that we are chosen for a grant (or six).  We are currently working on two more that will be complete in a few days.  

We sent in our profile books to the agency.  Our profile books are photo scrap books that we put together to give birth moms a little glimpse into our lives.  The birth moms get to look at the profile books and decide which family they feel would be a good fit for the baby.  The agency will start presenting us to birth moms as soon as they can.

"Wait, do you have all the money now to move forward?,"you may ask.  Why no, no we don't.  But, we know God is in control and are moving forward in faith.  We have had some amazing things happen recently where God confirms in us that He has got this.

A few weeks ago, I was praying and crying out to the Lord, feeling so overwhelmed.  I asked Him if we were still heading in the right direction.  Had we missed something?  Hours later, we got an email from a couple who wanted to give to our adoption.  Boom...God is good!

We have been working on a grant and submitted the first portion back in June.  We were supposed to receive a confirmation email giving us the next steps that we have to take.  This is the big grant that we have been looking forward to.  We have friends that received $10,000 from this amazing foundation.  A month went by and we heard nothing.  I thought maybe they never received our first application, so I resubmitted.  Still nothing.  We were starting to feel panicked as the final application process (which is very involved) is due Aug. 15.  I was praying and just asking the Lord what was going on.  He said, clear as ever, "Go check your spam folder".  I ran downstairs and sure enough, there were 3 emails from the foundation.  One of the emails was from the director asking why we re-applied.  I explained the story to her and we kicked it into high gear to get everything in.  Both of our agencies emailed letters within 15 minutes, our references were emailed and have either finished or are in process to finish tomorrow.  Our pastor texted and is coming to conduct the required interview tonight.  Then, we will have the essay portion and email our tax returns and what not and then wait (and pray).  We should know if we got the grant sometime next month.

In the meantime, we are getting the crib ready.  By getting the crib ready, I mean moving a little girl, who loves her crib, into a big girl bed.  I think it will be a process.  She is not a big fan of change but, she is so excited for a new baby to be in the house.  I am hoping that motivation will help the transition.
Please pray as the agency starts presenting our family to birth moms.  Pray for their hearts as they make the hardest decision of their lives.  Pray for our hearts as we wait and hope in the Lord alone.  Pray for preparation for each member of our family as we anticipate this change and excitement.  Praise God with us as we watch Him do His thing!!

We have been so humbled by this experience!

Roller Coaster of Emotions

We have been working on getting all of our paperwork together (very time consuming) for some grant applications due August 15th.
We have been putting the final touches on our profile book and are about to get those printed.
We are trying to be patient.

And then this happened.

We got an email on Friday regarding a birth couple looking for an adoptive family.  They have been presented with all the profiles that the agency has available and the birth mom "feels that she has not located the family that is meant to be for her baby." Even though we do not have our profile done, the agency feels that we are a really close match to what they are looking for and wanted to know if we were interested.

UMMMM...yes!  One little, minor thing.  The money.  We are $18,156.69 away from what we would need to complete this adoption.  

Here is the other crazy detail....baby boy is due on JULY 8!!!!  Yes...as in just over a month from now! 

It has been a roller coaster of emotions ranging from elation to discouragement.  We have full confidence that we are right where we are supposed to be and after much prayer and tears, we have decided that wisdom has won.  Even if we sold all of our possessions, I still don't think we could reach that dollar amount.  And, then where would we sit...let's be practical.  Jody is already working a second job and it is still a slow road.  We will work hard to apply for every grant we can and do all the fundraisers we can and then see where we stand.  

This experience has really made us excited to meet our baby when he comes along. 

Hey, and just in case you have $18,000 laying around, you can send it to: 

Premier Adoption 
590 West Mesquite Boulevard Suite 202B
Mesquite, Nevada 89027

Wink, wink.

Seriously though, please continue to pray for us as we navigate this journey.  Pray for our child.  Pray for grants to start coming in.  Pray for us to have wisdom in our decisions. 
Please pray for the birth family that I mentioned above.  They are in a desperate situation right now.  They are having to make one of the hardest decisions they will ever make in their lives.  Please pray for them!  Please pray for that little baby boy and that he would be placed with the perfect family.  I am so glad that they are waiting to find the right family for their baby.

We are trying to get those shoulder bars down fast enough and I am trying to stop screaming and open my eyes long enough to try to enjoy the ride. 

I hate roller coasters!

What a Week!!

This has been one of those weeks.

Let's have a quick recap:

•  One of the tires on the van went flat.
•  Our sprinklers in the backyard broke. 
• Our dishwasher broke.
• Our brand new toilet won't stop running.
• We had to pay $1200 toward our home study completion that we did not previously know would be due.
• We have had a few tornado warnings (Scary for me!).
• The kids have been on edge...let's be honest...we've all been a bit on edge. 
•  I have been late a lot. (I hate being late.)

This is a picture of what we had to do to cover up the big holes where the sprinklers were when it started raining...it was a quick solution to a potentially muddy situation!!  These little beauties are all around our lawn (so thankful it is our backyard with the problem!).

Thankfully,  we did have some great things mixed in as well...like Anderson (our oldest son) turned 8. Every year on his birthday, we are reminded of God's faithfulness and promises fulfilled!

Big boy!

Oh and our home study is COMPLETE!!  That's right!  It is done!!  Wahoo!!

Our home study will be sent to our agency in Nevada as they compile our profile and get us ready to start presenting our family to birth moms.  We LOVE, LOVE our agency in Nevada!  Premier Adoption has been the best!  They are so helpful, organized, professional, knowledgeable and patient!

We now move into the next phase of applying for grants and ramping up some fundraising.  We are still about $18,000 away from what we need (sigh).

Please pray for us as we get closer to meeting our baby.  Would you please pray for protection over our family!  Pray for things to stop breaking and that whatever comes our way, we would look to the ONE who is our protector and our provider and our strength.  Pray for us as we apply for a number of grants.  Pray that we are considered to receive some much needed funding!!  Please pray for that birth mom who has some hard and selfless decisions ahead of her.

Thank you so, so much!!  I cannot tell you how much it means to us to have people out there praying for us and lifting us up!

Here's hoping for a much less eventful week ahead...or at least for less breakage!!        

We Just Need One "Yes"

“Nope. No way. Not a chance. I don’t think so. Not here. Try again. No. No!” That about sums up the last 5 months of the adoption process. It doesn’t bother us (well, to a certain extent). We know that all we need is one yes!

From the beginning, we had thought we would adopt from some exotic locale. First we thought it would be the Caribbean, then Africa, then Asia, then South America, back to the Caribbean, and you know what we kept hearing from everywhere we looked? Sorry, your situation doesn’t work for us. What?! Come on!

So, we have searched high and low, east and west, north and south, and we are very excited to announce that the exotic land from which God will provide a child for us is…DRUMROLL PLEASE…wait for it…here it comes…Nevada.

We heard from people at the very beginning of the process that possibly the best way to get an international baby is by adopting from America, and in our case, that might be true!

We looked at and researched A LOT of agencies!  Some were not accepting new families, some were in a state with really hard laws for adoptive parents, and others were just plain sketchy.  We wanted to find a very organized, well-run agency with integrity within a state that had laws protecting adoptive parents.

So we’re sitting around one night, feeling a little bit defeated, and Jody says, “Hey, you know your AUNT that works for that ADOPTION agency?” “Yes.” “What about her agency?” “Oh yeah, guess we hadn’t thought of that one, yet.”

Hmmm. Wouldn’t that be interesting? You see, eight years ago my aunt and uncle had a random urge to move from the East Coast to a tiny town in Southern Utah (I don’t know that they would call it “random” but at the time they knew no one there, had never lived in the state, and didn’t have any ties to it AT ALL). She worked for a pregnancy crisis center there for a number of years and now works for an adoption agency based out of Nevada. What if one of the reasons God brought them to Utah was to lead us to our child?? What if?!

It has been so interesting to watch all the pieces fall into place.  We were so impressed by the organization of the office, the love and respect for the birth moms, and knowledge that the staff possesses. Not to mention, the laws for adoptive parents are ideal. We are excited!

Current completed checklist.

Country Chosen               X

State Chosen                 X

Agency Chosen               X

Home Study Complete     X

                   

Specific Prayer requests:

Protection and wisdom for the birth mom to make good choices, especially during the first trimester.

Our kids as they prepare for the adjustment.  

Provision. We’re just under halfway to what we need to pay for the adoption. Surprisingly, domestic adoptions cost the same, if not more, than international adoptions.

Do we have confidence that God will provide all that we need and more? Yes. Do we know exactly what that will look like? No. Are we excited to see what God does next and which mom will choose our family? YES! And that’s all we need.